The Path to Love – Help a Million vs. Make a Million

October 10, 2011

For decades now people, even those in spiritual circles, have lived according to the notion that the goal in life is to make a million (or even a billion) dollars.  But, as my book BEYOND THE SECRET revealed, this approach leads us far away from the path of love.  It is almost common knowledge that after people get their basic needs met (and I mean basic), their capacity for happiness goes down if they don’t become good stewards of their money for the good of all.  To compensate for their egotistical (and sometimes sociopathic) tendencies they resort to more and more addictive, controlling, and abusive tendencies.  In many ways they are “stomach down people.”  They are people who live from the lower drives of power, pleasure, and security and ignore the higher needs of love, compassion, honesty, integrity, vision, and unity with all.

Yet, before the masses become critical of those with wealth let us remember that there is nothing wrong with wealth per se.  As I have often said, if the 1.250 billionaires in the world gave away only 1 billion of their many billions to the 7 billion people on the planet, we would not have significantly less difficulties in the world today.  Fortunately, a number of wealthy people are good stewards of their wealth, though many are not.  But, here is my point – giving away money from the rich to the poor is not the answer.  Raising consciousness is the answer so that we live according to an ethic of LOVE.

What does an ethic of love look like?  Well, it doesn’t look like what most magazines present to us that glorify excess consumption.  Over and over we see celebrities spending anywhere between $30 million dollars on a wedding to $6000 on a pair of boots.  And, we are supposed to be excited and impressed by this?  Consider then how many lives could have been saved on this planet for this same amount of cash.  $100 can keep a child alive for a year in Africa.  So that is 60 lives that could have been saved for one pair of boots or 300,000 lives that could have been saved for a year for one wedding bash.  Yet, instead of feeling repulsed by this, magazines that show us these excessive lifestyles make a ton of cash.

So, why are we doing this?  And, are YOU doing this?  What are we teaching our children around the world with this kind of unloving ethic?  And, why do we want to glorify making a million over and over again as if excessive consumption, greed, and self-indulgent egotistical excess leads to happiness when over and over again we learn that it doesn’t?

An ethic of love looks much different.  It helps a million over making a million and the magazines would then be full of people who live relatively simply giving most of their cash away to help others once their basic needs are met (which can be done at about 50K a year).  Plus, when you are focused on service and helping others, there is nothing to fear. You can lose your money and your power.  But, you can never lose an opportunity to reach out and love others.   At least that is what my BEYOND THE SECRET book asserted one year before the economic crash happened (which I predicted was coming as early as January 2008).  And, I still assert it now.  HELP A MILLION and insist that those who have a million help a million as well.  That is the path to love and the new ethic that will lead us onto that path in the future.

Blessings,

Lisa

Copyright 2011 by Dr. Lisa Love. All rights reserved.

http://www.doctorlisalove.com/

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Why Am I Full of So Much Joy?

September 20, 2011

Seriously, I’ve been trying to figure it out.  What is this inner shift about?  I’m getting more joyful than I have ever been in my life.  But, it isn’t about external things — having or having not.  I think this is what the spiritual use of the law of attraction is about.  That inner state, joy, and bliss.

So, what is creating it in my life?  One thing that helped, I radically simplified my life so I could live my life from an inner flow.  On my vision board are not images of houses, cars, clothes, walking around town and looking in stores and thinking “I can have this, I can have that” aka “The Secret” style.  No, I’m focued on my own teachings and principles aka BEYOND THE SECRET style.  And, it’s working.

I get up and pretty much think, “Great, I’m still here.”  I practice my main meditation these days, remembering I am Spirit breathing this body, not a body breathing Spirit.  I look around and start to think how lucky I am.  Then, I remember that per every five words I write or speak somewhere on this planet a child is dying due to violence, disease, or hunger.  So, I think, “How can I help?”  Then I get busy trying to help others as much as I can from a state of joy and a real desire to give, instead of through an obligation to do so.

I am also struggling to discipline myself to exercise more and eat as I know I should.  I know everytime I exercise, eat right, and take my vitamins and herbs, I feel super-charged.  This is my main focus regarding my own life.  It is still a bit of a journey as I was raised on cakes, brownies, cookies, candy for desert almost every day of my life.  I’ve cut way back, but I still don’t do fruits and vegetables like I need to.  I am telling myself, “Do it not only for my personal health, but so I can be here longer to contribute to others.”  Then, I rely on the Spirit that I AM to breathe into this body, brain, and nervous system more discipline and determination.

What perplexes me is that technically I “have less” than I have ever had “stuff wise.”  In fact, I would like even less stuff.  One thing I do have is an abundance is books.  I have read a massive number of books in my life.  Several times I have given boxes and boxes of books away to libraries.  I just gave 26 boxes away last year.  Now, I would like to give the rest of my books away as soon as I can afford to get the really essential ones all on a Kindle (which I have yet to buy, but intend to).  Then, I will need even less space to live in (though I live in a small apartment), and be even more free to pack up and travel (like I am doing now on tour) to go out and meet and help people.

Eight years ago when I was losing my home, my marriage, a website (Soul to Spirit) I had spent years creating, and just about everything I owned I was crying up a storm.  I wrote BEYOND THE SECRET as I came out of that period in an attempt to figure out why I had gone through everything I had.  I mean I am one heck of a positive thinker and person.  Believe me, it was NOT due to my “negative thinking.”  Read my book BEYOND THE SECRET to learn more.

I kept meditating, praying, and working through a wide variety of feelings (the insights of doing that process are summarized in my FEELING GOOD & LIVING GREAT book).  I strengthened my spiritual cable to my true spiritual self and did a lot more inner work (and in my life I’ve already done an excessive amount of that, but there is always more to do).  Now, I am almost overjoyed.  And, it isn’t because my external life is perfect (perfect partner, house, health, etc).  It is because I just don’t focus on externals much at all anymore.  I focus on laughter, love, joy, being creative, and giving.

As I am touring these days I am around a lot of people who are struggling as they are losing “things.”  To be honest I actually find this kind of amusing.  The Buddhists say all things are imperment, even this body.  Don’t worry about stuff.  Focus on the part of you that is the REAL YOU.  When you do, you will get it.  We are NOT HERE TO CONSUME, we are here to CONTRIBUTE!

Get into what you have to GIVE, instead of what you want to GET, and your life will be filled with miracles.  Look, I had the pleasure of sitting in the homes of 100’s of people 60 to 103.  All were physically ill.  Learning from them I got it.  I really did!  The ONLY thing that made people happy at the end of their lives was how much they learned to love and give in this world.  Didn’t matter if they had a yacht behind their mansion, or were in a homeless shelter.  The externals didn’t matter.  I met rich people who were terribly unhappy, and rich people were full of love and joy.  I met poor people who were terribly unhappy, and poor people who were full of love and joy.  And, ALL OF THEM WERE SICK.  So forget the health part even.  I kept puzzling over this whole thing.  If externals (rich/poor) didn’t make the difference and health was something none of them had, then how did they pull off the joy?

Here is how…

1) They were full of gratitude.

2) They were full of love.

3) They focused on what they could still give to help others no matter what.

4) They found the humor in life.

5) They laughed.

6) They smiled.

7) They had a spiritual practice.

8) They knew who they really were.

9) Even in the face of death they had no fear.

What an amazing process.  If anyone would have told me years ago when I was losing my home, work, relationship, even my health for a time, that I was going to end up more joyful than I had ever been, I would have thrown them out of my life.  Yet, here I am.  And, I’m still pretty young.  I’m getting it.  I’m living the message of my own teachings.  And, here is the good news…. if the rest of the planet wakes up in the same way…. well, we are in for one glorious time!  No, we may not have as much stuff.  We may even create an economy where we DON’T WANT STUFF!  (Imagine that).  But, we will have so much joy!  Not even happiness (which is mostly based on me getting what I want), but joy (which is based on me contributing all I can whether I get what I personally want or not).  Here in the USA we may even change the constitution to life, liberty, and the pursuit of JOY.  And, as we live from joy we will be shocked we ever wanted to live that other way before.

So, maybe that is it  Maybe that is why I get up and just laugh so much these days.  I don’t take it seriously.  Even my photo here on Facebook.  People tell me I need a “glamour” shot.  You know where I get my teeth fixed, have someone do my hair and makeup.  Put the little hand under the chin, etc.  Honestly, the reason I like the picture I am using is because I was literally laughing at myself.  I was cracking myself up.  For the first time ever I took one of those cell phone shots where you stand in front of a mirror and click the picture.  I thought, “This is pretty hysterical.  Can you imagine using this photo publically?”  Then, when I saw myself, I went, “Wow!  Ok, maybe the hair can be better, and the lighting better, and I still haven’t gotten those crooked teeth fixed, but THERE I AM!  I can see ME!  The real ME!  Not the surface me.  The light inside of me.  The joy inside of me.  The humor and not taking it seriously part of me.”

“Good enough,” I thought.  Up the picture went on Facebook.

Today then, why not do the same?  Just don’t take stuff so seriously anymore.  Let your light shine.  Let your joy shine.  Let your love shine.  Then go out there and see who needs your help.  Even if life sucks around you.  Be there for someone.  In the meantime, I will do my best to be there for you.

Blessings,

Lisa

Copyright 2011 by Dr. Lisa Love. All rights reserved.

http://www.doctorlisalove.com/

http://www.facebook.com/drlisalove

http://www.twitter.com/doctorlisalove

Want help with the above? Check out my website: http://doctorlisalove.com/

Or, call me for a coaching session. Learn more on at this address.

http://doctorlisalove.com/coaching.html

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http://www.doctorlisalove.com/freegifts.html

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Meditation as a Major Tool to Expand Your Heart

September 6, 2011

(The following is an excerpt from MEDITATION: THE PATH TO PEACE).

At this level meditation is also less oriented towards expansions of consciousness. These will continually occur.  Rather, meditation is now a process of anchoring your understanding that you live in the eternal by revealing it to others primarily by sustaining yourself in its deep abiding peace. Because of this when you have truly reached this level you rarely, and ideally never, are disrupted mentally, emotionally, and physically by the transitory nature of your outer life.

This awareness so fills you with the reality of love in the Universe you are drenched in this love on a moment by moment basis. Despite all outer appearances of pain and suffering, the reason behind suffering is revealed to you. Suffering is after all, simply ignorance of our true nature as love. Aware of this love, suffering ceases. At the same time out of your ability and desire to love others, you remain sensitive to the suffering around you.  You comprehend how ignorance continues to produce suffering in the world. Out of a need for compassion you do your best to relieve the world of this ignorance, and to awaken others regarding their true identities as spiritual beings. In this way the pain and trauma caused by an illusory separation from spiritual essence diminishes. The nature of Reality is increasingly revealed. That nature being primarily one of LOVE.

Benefit Exercise, Seven. Take some time to consider the following: “What would it mean to you if you were in fact, loved?” “If indeed, despite all outer appearances the Universe around you was a sea of compassion and love? And, that all appearance of suffering, were really manifestations of ignorance as to the existence of this love?” Think of the moments in your life when you felt you “glimpsed” this sense of love. Then ask yourself, “What would your life be like and how would you be if no matter what happened to you in life, this presence of love, always infused you, and surrounded you?” After reflecting for some minutes, affirm to yourself here and now, ”I am One with All. All is Love. This is my only security. This is my only identity.” Stay with this affirmation and as you do so, reflect how it feels to rest within this statement.  Learn more about the book MEDITATION: THE PATH TO PEACE by Dr. Lisa Love.

Love and blessings,

Lisa

Copyright 2011 by Dr. Lisa Love. All rights reserved.

http://www.doctorlisalove.com

http://www.facebook.com/drlisalove

http://www.twitter.com/doctorlisalove

Want help with the above? Check out my website: http://doctorlisalove.com

Or, call me for a coaching session. Learn more on at this address.

http://doctorlisalove.com/coaching.html

 

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Take Back Your Power and Love Yourself

September 6, 2011

As a professional counselor for years I would tell people they needed to learn to love themselves.  But, beyond a platitude, how do you actually do that?  Ironically, one of the ways I discovered how to love yourself, was to consider all the ways people (especially women) were not loving themselves.  And, the more I thought about that, the more I realized that one of the main reasons women were not loving themselves was because of what they were being taught about love (almost all false) especially from movies.  Starting way back as young as when women are girls, they are being taught a variety of false notions about love.  These notions include:

  • Putting yourself last and your man first.
  • Waiting to live your life until a man comes and finds you.
  • Tolerating beastly behaviors.
  • Playing dumb and refusing to see the shadow side of life.
  • Misunderstanding how men learn to love and then confusing sex with love.
  • Settling for half a relationship instead of a whole one.
  • Much, much more!

Ultimately, these false notions were changed into their opposites creating a blueprint for how women (and men) could take back their power, love themselves, and learn to really love each other in the process.  Some of those opposites include:

  • Putting yourself and your dreams first in a healthy way.
  • Getting conscious about what you really want and finding healthy ways to pursue it.
  • Teaching others to treat you well because you know what good treatment looks like and feels like.
  • Knowing how to deal with the light and shadow in an effective way.
  • Discovering how to get a man to really love you.
  • Bringing together love and sex in a playful and healthy way.
  • Learning how to be whole so you can have a whole and truly loving relationship.
  • Settling for half a relationship instead of a whole one.
  • Much, much more!

Now that you know some of the basics why not find out how you can expand on these basics by taking one of the top courses about loving yourself on DailyOM?  Go here and learn to take back your power and love yourself now!

Love and blessings,

Lisa

Copyright 2011 by Dr. Lisa Love. All rights reserved.

http://www.doctorlisalove.com

http://www.facebook.com/drlisalove

http://www.twitter.com/doctorlisalove

Want help with the above? Check out my website: http://doctorlisalove.com

Or, call me for a coaching session. Learn more on at this address.

http://doctorlisalove.com/coaching.html

 

FREE GIFTS ON MY WEBSITE:

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Changing into Someone You Are Not – Ariel, the Little Mermaid – How NOT to Love Yourself

August 31, 2011

Is a man really loving you for you, or are you really loving yourself if you turn into a change project to become someone you are not? That is what Princess Ariel does, also known as the Little Mermaid. And, is trying to please a man by morphing into someone else she is just one more example of HOW NOT TO LOVE YOURSELF, the name of the new book by Dr. Lisa Love. Are you acting in a naïve way like Snow White? If so, learn how to stop. The book is also available as a combined text, audio, video course at DailyOM.com under the title TAKE BACK YOUR POWER AND LOVE YOURSELF

 


Keeping the Heart Open When Life Disappoints

August 17, 2011

I’ve written about it a number of times, but it is worth the reminder.  How do we keep our hearts open when life disappoints?  I
know of no better way then the practice of compassion.  Compassion involves the art of sitting with your suffering as if you are in the midst of a Divine friend who is shining love upon you like a golden sun that both cools the anger in your heart and then melts the ice that lies on top of the anger.

It also involves the capacity to look at life with a calm, clear, and loving detachment.  Knowing how to get to this point is the same as knowing how to cultivate the witness or observer.  This observer is not cold and calculated, however.  It is wise and all-knowing and many people find it helpful to imagine this observer to be an aspect of Spirit, or a loving spiritual teacher, or akin to an angel watching over you.

In the loving light of that observer you are both able to heal your hurt and to move into loving acceptance of what is.  This acceptance is not resignation.  It is very much related to that famous saying about changing what you can, realizing what you cannot, and having the wisdom to know the difference.  If you can change it insight will emerge.  That insight will reveal how you or others need to do your shadow work, to look at ways you, or others around you were unskillful and unwise in their
thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

But, without that willingness to do the shadow work on the part of yourself or others, change may not occur.  For change and the desire to do the work in the shadow can only happen if people are willing to look and to become more responsible, caring, loving, forgiving, compassionate, and wise.  If not, then acceptance that change cannot occur frees you to let go – to move on.  And, even there the heart can be utilized to offer compassion within the acceptance of what cannot change, what cannot be.

Through compassion then the heart doesn’t break and crumble, it breaks open and expands.  There love is born, love is known for yourself – for others –  for all!

Love and blessings,

Lisa

Copyright 2011 by Dr. Lisa Love. All rights reserved.

http://www.doctorlisalove.com

http://www.facebook.com/drlisalove

http://www.twitter.com/doctorlisalove

 

Want help with the above? Check out my website: http://doctorlisalove.com

Or, call me for a coaching session. Learn more on at this address.

http://doctorlisalove.com/coaching.html

 

FREE GIFTS ON MY WEBSITE:

http://www.doctorlisalove.com/freegifts.html

 

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Feel free to Share this post on Facebook. You may also share it on other
websites and Ezines provided you include everything above, the article
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Loving Self and Others: Three Powerful Tips

August 17, 2011

Over a decade ago I worked at a wellness center in San Diego and coined the phrase “well-full-ness.”  And, with clients I frequently
teach people your well must be full of love before you have love to give to others. Knowing this I then started to dive into more specifically what in the world does it really mean to love yourself?  And, how do you distinguish between loving yourself and living in a selfish way that is really only feeding your egotistical tendencies.

Actually, the more I have learned to love myself the simpler the answer gets.  The more I truly love myself, the more I know what love is and the more I am able to love others.  That is why in my book Attracting Real Love and my upcoming book How NOT to Love Yourself I focus so much on getting really clear about love.

In my Youtube videos (www.youtube.com/doctorlisalove) I discuss some of the myths of love like love is blind, love hurts, and love ends.  In my articles and books I also talk about how love expands love.  When you love someone you teach them how to love themselves and others more inteilligently and compassionately.  That is why getting “well-full” with love means learning some of the following:

1)  Love is Paradox.  Love is capable of seeing both sides of something.  It is a holistic view.  It takes the time to look at the whole picture, see both points of view, and attempts to come to an inclusive view that brings about a larger picture. This doesn’t happen when people are invested in winning and losing, which leads to point two.

2)  Love is Compassionate. In compassionate communication we are taught that most people adopt two options in communication.  Option one.  I’m right and you are wrong.  That means there has to be winners and losers.  So, either you win and I  lose, or I win and you lose.  So, if I want to win I will fail to consider your point of view or have empathy for you.  Or, if I want to
lose I will consider your needs and point of view, and invalidate my own.  This is not love.  It’s abuse and victimhood.  Option two.  There are no winners and losers.  No one is right and wrong.  There are two people attempting to understand each other and have compassion for themselves and the other person.  Calmly and lovingly they consider each other’s needs and wants and through dialogue work to find peaceful ways to help both people find what makes them happy.  In my work as a relationship and love counselor time and again I see how people who can choose option two create magic and miracles together.  Sadly, those invested in option one end up in eternal war.  Or, the person who is trying to be compassionate has to walk away from the person invested in
the right/wrong blame game, until that person has suffered enough that they are willing to surrender blame/abuse/rightness and try a more loving approach.

3)  Love Sees the Light & the Shadow.  When we are invested in the win/lose game we typically don’t want to see the shadow in ourselves, or point out the shadow in others.  In fact, we naively believe that seeing the shadow is someone not loving.  But, love is inclusive, not exclusive.  And, sometimes the most loving thing you can do is throw the light on the shadow, because only then
can you bring it into more light.  So, love doesn’t pretend the shadow in yourself and others doesn’t exist.  Love is not blind.  It has 20/20 vision and that includes shadow and the light. In the light love attempts to include, reveal, understand, and heal what is going on in ourselves and others.  It moves through shame and guilt by bringing about compassion and healing.  And, it does so in a way where others don’t just let themselves off the hook for ignorant and hurtful behaviors, but work to change those behaviors to become more loving people.

Only when we can start to create a world where people have enough love to do the above can we move to the deeper aspects of real love, which goes beyond confusing love with abuse, neediness, codependency, lust, pleasure, addiction and pain.  And, it is to that quest I continue to dedicate my life.  I hope you will join me.?

Love and blessings to you!

Lisa

Copyright 2011 by Dr. Lisa Love. All rights reserved.

http://www.doctorlisalove.com

http://www.facebook.com/drlisalove

http://www.twitter.com/doctorlisalove

Want help with the above? Check out my website: http://doctorlisalove.com

Or, call me for a coaching session. Learn more on at this address.

http://doctorlisalove.com/coaching.html

 

FREE GIFTS ON MY WEBSITE:

http://www.doctorlisalove.com/freegifts.html

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Feel free to Share this post on Facebook. You may also share it on other
websites and Ezines provided you include everything above, the article
and all the information about how to reach me via my website and pick up
free gifts as well. Thank you.

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